Dear parent in the playground

General forum for the UK Keratoconus and self-help group members.

Click on the forum name, General Discussion Forum, above.

Moderators: Anne Klepacz, John Smith, Sweet

User avatar
Posts: 861
Joined: Tue 12 May 2009 11:46 pm
Keratoconus: Yes, I have KC
Vision: Other
Location: Leeds

Dear parent in the playground

Postby space_cadet » Mon 08 May 2017 11:03 am

This is something I wrote on my blog so thought Id share ...

Dear parent stood in the school playground,

When you see me waiting for my daughter, I am curious to what you see? Do you see the parent who is stood holding a cane to guide their vision, a parent who has lost most of their sight over the past decade, the parent who holds a degree and craves to get back to the Masters level education they were receiving prior to falling pregnant? Do you see a parent who like you has a young small person in school, receiving a education in which they are constantly reminded they can and they will succeed? To ask questions when unsure to gain a better comprehension of the world around?

Do you see obstacles in my journey? which you add to by not assisting when out n about, by talking about “that white stick, why does she have it?” questioning all but me?! Does the fact my sight is impaired actually cause you to challenge your own perception of disability in a way that you never actually gave much thought previously?

When our children are attending a friends party and I ask you where my daughter is, it is not simply a case of if I wore glasses I would be able to see her, or if my phone was in my bag shed have my attention. Or you pointing and informing me “she is over there”. Wearing glasses wont actually “fix” my vision, if they would has it not occured to you I would have begun to wear them long ago? and as for my phone I actually use it to magnify to aid me so that I have a vague idea of what my daughter is upto, but when I ask you it is because I have assumed you might be in a place where your vision is better than mine and you can use words to describe my daughters actions to me and in turn enable me to see all which she and her peers are doing. Words used by others can and do become my eyes, describe all to me even what may to you be mundane as it is the detail which I adore and lust after which enables me to see and appriciate the detail of every day occurrences which you take for granted.

Please don’t simply point as I can not see where you are pointing and as such you are not actually answering my question, but instead you will cause me to ask more from you.

My daughter is incredible, at four years young she is able to confidently describe her world, guide me when we walk so “mummy careful their is a bin in your way” so I dont walk into it, she has the confidence to explain to people “her eyes are a little broken but she is still MY mummy and I love her because she is MY mummy” she is a cheeky girl with a incredible fearless passion for life, she has a enchanting sense of humour which attracts friendships around her, I am proud of her every moment of every day just because she is herself.

Yet at the same time she does more than some other children of her age, she knows already how to cook simple things, to place food on a oven tray to pass to me to cook her dinner, how to make a simple sandwhich, what to do to run a bath, where things needed for day to day tasks are, as before we leave the house “have you got your cane, do you need different sunglasses to protect you as the sun is strong”. She knows how to with confidence and assertion answer basic questions about why her mummy is disabled and to answer them in a way which as a adult you are heard to say is “challenging”. But perhaps instead of finding it challenging, have the guts to come to me, talk to me, find out more about me and how my world is, and be a friend not only to my daughter but me as well, and then dear parent in the school playground you will realise I might be blind but their is far more to me than that.
May09 Diagnosed with KC, March 2010 after a failed transplant it has left me legally blind a long cane user (since 2010) who is blind in a once sighted world

Return to “General Discussion Forum”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 15 guests