Good luck to Rosemary

[rosemary johnson]

That is very interesting, and does indeed make a lot of sense!
It ties in with the theories about dreams being the result of your brain "reprocessing" the things you've been doing recently - a bit like going through the paperwork etc when you get home from a conference, expo or similar - chucking a loada bumph into the recycling crate, filing the name badges and programme details with the CPD log, putting various interesting background stuff in the bookcase for future reference, and sitting down (or getting int he bath!) with the immediately relevant stuff to take it in properly and decide what to do aout it.
They theorists say we all have to do that - and have to have the dreams that result if the recent experiences ere particularly vivid - or we'll never process and get over the memories.
But f that is what they are suggesting, that tends to reinforce my impression that the people who talk about PTSD are afflicted with constantly re-rolling replays of the (recent, or otherwise) PAST.
What I get is not replays - not for quite a while now. They're about the NEXT time - when we're supposed to be getting it right and it suddenly starts to go pear-shaped again (not always inthe same way). And all with That Certain Surgeon nowhere around.
Which is why "shell shock" rang bells - the accounts I've read of people with shell shock seem to be more about them being back fighting the next battle and not being able to cope with the future prospect of that, rather than replaying a particular incident.
Unless my reading on WWI and shell shock is too limited, of course, but that's my impression.
Cuold be linked with why they seem to be worse if my eye's been hurting - itches more if treis to flick about like REM ...... though would that apply if I'm actually awake??
Being slightly concerned there'sa problem with this new lens doesn't help, I suppose, nor does the hay fever. Or hot sticky nights wehn it's hard to sleep. Or the question I still ahve to ask my nice new consultant (who I really don't want to end up strangling in the new bits of bad trip), or the email with the questions I have asked and not had replies to yet. Or....
Or the info pack from the Medicalert people sitting on the table in front of me that I'm wondering how on earth to fit what I want any emergency services to know into the space sonthe form.....!!!
Oh well.
Got letter this morning with appointment with Neuro-Ophthalmologists, btw. Not till early October, but at least it's in the system. We will see what transpires.
BTW went down to Brighton last week with two of the people from the "stable yard" (field) where Duke lives. We stayed 2 nights in Brighton, and went to HIckstead to watch the showjumping on the day in between. Go tvery hot, dry, dusty and suntanned, and spent rather a lot of money at the market stalls - stocking up on year's supply of jodhpurs and the gadget for taking stones out of horse's hooves...... not too good for the eyes, lungs, nose, etc etc ..... not to mention the visa card bill, ouch..... and sitting up late with pizza and glasses of wine probably not help either!
Been in touch with Ken; says he needs to see this eye/lens with the air bubbles/rainbow rings problems, but doesn't seem to think it's too bad......
I live in Hope..... as they say in parts of NOrth Wales.
Rosemary

[Barbara Davis]

May I make one observation on your last message, Rosemary? Please don't pay too much attention to what are allegedly the symptoms of PTSD, shell shock or anything else. Even with physical problems, the signs and symptoms people have differ enormously. You need only look at this forum as evidence: most people here have KC, but that manifests itself in a very wide variety of different ways. How much more is that likely to be the case with a psychological problem, where you can't look into an eye and see a distorted cornea or something else quantifiable?

I agree with you and Hilary. There does seem to be reason to think there has been a psychological consequence to the original physical trauma of your reaction to steriods - hardly surprising given the horrendous experience you had. Whether that involves flashbacks or flashforwards, PTSD or the milder traumatic stress, something similar to shell shock or whatever....... none of that really seems the point to me. They are all fairly arbitrary, empirical diagnoses anyway.

What matters, I think, is what you do now, not the labels you put on things. I suspect that to a large extent what you can do is independent of the precise label. I think it's important you accept the psychological dimension, and that it will probably fade in time. I think you are doing the right thing talking about it - bottling things up won't help. But don't obsess about it either. I think that could reinforce neural pathways, a form of learning. It's a matter of finding a balance between the two (as I'm sure you know: apologies for stating the obvious!) and I think you are absolutely right to do something else when things get bad. Don't forget that you can always phone me, any time, if it will help: I might not wake if I'm asleep, but I sleep at odd times and if I am woken it won't worry me.

Other than that, I imagine there is a range of techniques on the web. Hilary's eye movement one sounds very interesting, if perhaps not quite the best choice for you. I'm sure you can decide what to try and what not <grin>.

As for professional help - I appreciate the problems. You certainly don't need analysis! As a last resort, it is possible someone could suggest some techniques or even help you with them, and even just one appointment might be all that is needed. So I suggest not ruling it out entirely. But in the meantime I imagine there is stuff you can do on your own or with a friend. And just give it time.

I'm glad Ken doesn't seem too worried about the strange effects you are having. Take care, and let me know if there is anything I can realistically do to help. And we are promised cooler weather soon.....

Hmmm: if that's one observation just be glad I didn't try to make two!

[rosemary johnson]

The impressions of "symptoms of PTSD" come from what I've heard from people I know describing their experiences of it.
I agree this is a comparatively small sample of the total population of those affected.
NOt sure what I said that you say you're agreeing with...
Rosemary

[Barbara Davis]

Well sure, most accounts of PTSD probably come from sufferers, directly or indirectly (although that does not invalidate the signs spotted by others). That doesn't mean every sufferer has the same symptoms. Most people take steroids with no problems, but that does not invalidate the experience of an apparently tiny minority who react badly to them. I was just trying to make the point that one should not rely over much on the experience of some people however authoritative their experience might be. It's almost axiomatic in medicine that signs and symptoms vary enormously between people.

As for what I was agreeing with, urm.... I was just generally trying to be be agreeable <smile>. Or more particularly, since you ask, trying to set the broad context for my remarks as being a general agreement with what had been said in the past few posts. Yes, I know that's unusual <even broader smile>.....

[Andrew MacLean]

Well done Barbara!

Andrew